Tag Archives: mental-health

Befriending

Jealousy. Bitterness. Spite. Rage. These course through me repeatedly at various intervals, turning the inner eye inside out. The minuscule veins bloom from the sight-bulb as it scans the lives of others through a putrid lens of desire. It’s an … Continue reading

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Perfect Sight

There is a white hot rage in me, mixed in with a black tar rotting decay. A festering volcano, the afterbirth of trauma. Lack of control of internal emotional processes. This is a legacy of being overpowered, you really lose … Continue reading

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Dancing.

Going out dancing. This is, not new, but new in that it’s been a while. I keep imagining it going poorly. Feeling isolated and alone. Not being able to enjoy myself. But this is phooey. I can’t predict the future. … Continue reading

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Adapting.

I am living guilt free. Stay in bed ’till four? OK! Eat three bagels in a row? OK! Not exercise whatsoever? OK! Sigh. None of these things are okay but I don’t know to stop the cycle of, whatever this … Continue reading

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Winning.

Listening to Rhiannon by Fleetwood Mac. “Will you ever win?” I feel like I’m winning. I got up early today, wrote a lot, read a lot, entertained some company. Doing well. The future doesn’t scare me nearly as much. The … Continue reading

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Living.

It’s no small thing to be alive. I need to remember that I have a duty to myself to embrace this experience. It is temporary. I feel small and insignificant, but so do most people. We’re not. I believe that … Continue reading

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Somehow, Somewhere.

I am in pain, and that’s okay. It doesn’t stop. It doesn’t go away. I am alone at the library. I am surrounded by people. I feel alone and desperate. Desperate for company and comfort. Comfort. How do I find … Continue reading

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