Rebuilding.

So I’m scared of myself and my abilities, as most people are. I’m scared to see what I can do. I can’t live like this, I have to be fearless. I have to be a warrior. I worked out today, for not very long. I was very tired very quickly, despite eating well. I’m sleeping too much. Over twelve hours sometimes. My appetite is strong today. Eating lentils with spinach. At least I’m starting to eat well again. No more Cheerio dinners. I’m still living in the shadow of personal disaster. I only recently got off Seroquel. I need to remember that. It’s been almost a year since the hospitalizations. Hard to imagine. Twice. No more, please. My mind isn’t going to the dark places, which is good. Mind, I appreciate this on your part. On my part. I can see my wrists and stay sane. What a luxury. There needs to be more advocacy for persons with mental health. For our struggles and our stories. But it’s our responsibility to tell them. It starts with us. Blogging is a part of that. I love this medium. I should read more blogs. I feel so weak. So tired. Exercising and weight training will help me regain my physical and emotional strength. I can do so much more than I think I can. I must believe in this. I have to.  

About Victoria Valerie

A woman who remembers enjoying writing.
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